Stay with Me

“And He took with Him Peter and James and John, and began to be greatly distressed and troubled. And He said to them, ‘My soul is very sorrowful, even to death. Remain here and watch.’”  ~Mark 14:33-34

There are times throughout the Gospels when the raw humanity of our Lord Jesus Christ bursts astoundingly into focus. One such instance is when Jesus entered the bowels of the Garden of Gethsemane. Being in agony at the prospect of suffering our hell, He was sorrowful unto death — so much so that He shook on the ground with bloody sweat.

Just as remarkable is that a stone’s throw away were His three best friends. Jesus wanted them there. It was important to Jesus that His friends were with Him! Jesus, as well as being fully God, was a true man, and so we aren’t surprised that He wanted His friends near to Him in His darkest moments. In His desperation, He didn’t want to be alone. 

Sometimes, sadly, the people of God are left to soldier on alone. “At my first defense no one came to stand by me, but all deserted me,” said Paul (2 Tim. 4:16). Of course, Paul went on to say, “But the Lord stood by me and strengthened me ... The Lord will rescue me from every evil deed and bring me safely into His heavenly kingdom” (vv. 17, 18). The Lord will always stand with His people. Jesus is the friend who sticks closer than a brother (Prov. 18:24). But sometimes others don’t stand with us, and sometimes we neglect to stand with others.

That isn’t how it ought to be. Have you noticed how replete the Scriptures are with exhortations to show friendship to others? “Above all, keep loving one another earnestly ...  Show hospitality to one another” (1 Pet. 4:8-9). “Rejoice with those who rejoice, weep with those who weep” (Rom. 12:15). “Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ” (Gal 6:2).

Praise the Lord for how our congregation loves on one another! I’m astonished at how thoroughly — particularly these last few months — we have rallied around one another. And yet, I fancy this new year will be a pressing year to stand with one another more and more. Sickness, death, and grief await.   

How do we stand with one another? How do we communicate expressions of love? Sometimes, in the past, when beside someone mourning or severely sick, I’ve felt a strong need to deliver a “golden bullet” — to say something profound that somehow will make everything better. But often that’s not how it works. Think of the friends of Job: “Now when Job's three friends heard of all this evil that had come upon him, they came each from his own place ... They made an appointment together to come to show him sympathy and comfort him. And when they saw him from a distance, they did not recognize him. And they raised their voices and wept, and they tore their robes and sprinkled dust on their heads toward heaven. And they sat with him on the ground seven days and seven nights, and no one spoke a word to him, for they saw that his suffering was very great” (Job 2:11-13).

It takes wisdom to know not only what to say and not say, but also when to speak and not speak. And sometimes there is no speaking at all. Sometimes it’s just dropping off a meal, sending a text or card saying that you are praying (and actually praying), helping with chores or childcare, offering financial aid or gift cards, or just being ready to listen or sit in silence. The Lord will give wisdom to those who ask (James 1:5).

Brothers and sisters, let me encourage you to approach this year with an eagerness to stand by your brothers and sisters — not an eagerness to ask, “Who’s got my back?” but an eagerness to get the backs of your brothers and sisters. This congregation has a history of standing by one another, so let me just say with Paul, “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing” (1 Thess. 5:11).

Rev. Rob Dykes, Pastor of Preaching & Congregational Care